Thursday, June 7, 2012

A Newly Single Adult



It still hasn’t really hit me yet. I don’t feel old enough to graduate! I really do feel the same as I did freshman year, and the only real improvement I’ve made is that I’ve had my braces removed since then.  And yet I did walk down the aisle as the band played Pomp and Circumstance and I did throw my mortar board along with the rest of the class of 2012.
Graduation is particularly a funny thing if you’re a mormon. In our church we have the Young Women Program for girls from the ages of 12  until they graduate. Once you graduate high school, you kind of graduate from Young Womens. The funny thing about it is that the next step from there is the Single Adults group.
I remember my friend Becca commenting that “single adult” sounds like a term you would give to an older person who is desperately in want of a husband. And that is pretty much exactly how it is! One minute I was a young woman, learning to grow and develop, and the next minute I was thrown into the world of “what are you doing with your life? when are you going to get a job? get a boyfriend? get married?”. To be honest, I’m kind of exaggerating. Sort of.
It is true that marriage and families are extremely important to the my religion, which is fine by me since those are things I personally want. Yet, without really meaning to, it does put a bit of pressure on us “single adults” of the mormon culture. Suddenly every church activity might be where you meet “the one” and every boy you meet just might be that “one” and eternal companion.
Knowing all this to be ridiculous, and yet feeling like it was true with every fiber of my being, I was still really nervous about my first Single Adults’ activity. It was just a simple little picnic dinner in the park on Memorial Day where we could mix and mingle, but I still spent an hour picking out my outfit. What if my one day future husband was there? I didn’t want him to see me for the first time looking like the princess of drab!
Finally I picked out a skirt and black top, a mix of casual and classy, and set out with some gal pals to the picnic. The other funny thing about Single Adult groups is that the ages range from “I just graduated high school” to “I’m about to get my PHD and start my life career”. So when I first arrived all I could see was how much more facial hair and muscle all the guys had compared to the boys I was used to seeing. I felt like 5 year old trying to play grown up.
Luckily my bestie Jessica came and pulled me out of my awkward shell.
“Miranda, let’s make it a goal to meet as many people as we can tonight,” she said as we passed by three guys talking together. She immediately turned to me and half whispered, “what about them?”
“I don’t know. They’re too attractive,” I said hesitantly. As mean as it makes me for saying it, it’s definitely easier to talk to boys who weren’t . . .as physically blessed. Pretty boys in general make me feel inferior.
“They didn’t seem THAT cute,” she insisted. As I looked at her and how confident she was, I knew that that was what I wanted and decided to go for it.
“If you walk up to them I’ll follow,” I told her. So she did, and was right there along with her, talking to these three guys I’d never met before.
It turned out that we happened to be extremely lucky on the first shot! All three of them were nice guys and were easy to talk to. Though they were all awesome, there was one in particular that I liked talking to, and even better than that, he actually seemed to like talking to me. Rather having me ask all the questions he actually asked about my life and seemed genuinely interested in what I said. What girl doesn’t love it when that actually happens? It also didn’t hurt that he had the most adorable freckled face.
I found out he had recently gotten back from his mission - a religious calling that lasts two years - in England, which gave us something to talk about. I asked him what he liked about Europe and shared that I’d lived in France for a year. It was nice how easy it was to chat with him, and i don’t mean to sound creepy or anything, but he had a great smile.
Later, after having been pulled away from them, Jessie pointed out what a cute couple we’d be! So naturally I spent the rest of the night thinking about him and wishing I’d gotten his number. I was still thinking about it as I drove back with my friend Caroline.
“Maybe I’ll meet him at another thing and I’ll get his number then,” I remarked.
“Maybe,” she said.
“Do you think I’m too young for him?” I asked, which was weird for me since I’m usually worried about looking too much older than I am.
“No, this is the time to get married Miranda, you won’t be like this forever. Soon we’ll be too old and who will want marry us then?” she joked, laughing, “And, actually, this could be the perfect time. ‘Cause return missionaries feel pressure to get married when they first come back.”
“Well, I’ll get his number next time,” I laughed, “that is, if he isn’t already engaged by then. You never know with mormons.”

*sigh* . . . it's amazing how fast I've grown up

- Loverly :3

4 comments:

  1. Oh, Miranda! I remember those days . . . and all those feelings . . . like it was yesterday. You're awesome!! Just be your happy, positive self and have lots of fun and things will all work out as they should. I miss you in Young Women already!

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  2. Nanny- I love you! This is adorable. At those single adult activities I often had the best of times flirting like crazy till I found the one person, boy or girl, I enjoyed talking to. That is what we are good at talking and listening to people. Be confident knowing that that is an asset makes you an instant friend. "Single adult" life is pretty amazing. Date like crazy. Love you!

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  3. I love this! And it seriously is such a weird transition! You are doing it wonderfully though! :) And thank goodness for awesome friends who help us out through the awkward stages! Haha.

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  4. Miranda! I miss your face (: you need to come back to young women's until we all leave for college, you have the rest of your life to be a single young adult :P haha but seriously! But i am glad to see you are having fun in the singles ward and mingling with boys! Be confident and in no time you will be married!! Stay cute! Love ya! (:

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